Random musings

Let's make a deal!

2012-02-01T18:22:00.000-08:00

The simplest and most obvious way to celebrate Soul Train's Don Cornelius's life is to dance to some old school funk. Dance around clothing-optional, when no one's looking, getting lost in the thump. So make me a promise that you'll do this at least once by the weekend. I'm going to, too. Actually, I already did.

I tranced to "Soul Makossa" by Manu Dibango.
The song's below.

And now, it's your turn, gentle reader. Do it for Don.

Don Cornelius - May he rest in peace.

Seaplane to East Hampton

2011-11-26T16:09:00.000-08:00

The Standard Hotel Group has added a concierge Cessna 208 seaplane to its' offerings at their NYC property, but you don't need to be a hotel guest to fly. The seaplane shuttles between the 23rd Street NY Skyports Marina in Manhattan and East Hampton and runs during the summer months only, smartly so. :) The website states tickets run $495 per person one-way but if your schedule's flexible, you can apparently shave off a significant amount of the ticket price by "playing the flight board." (I'm not actually sure what all is involved with that ... my apologies.) The website claims off-peak flights can get as low as $29 per person one way, so bargain fun-hunters need not feel snubbed. In any event, it's an unusual antidote to Hampton traffic gridlock. You can learn more about it here. Enjoy!

World Population Reaching 7B

2011-10-27T08:27:00.000-07:00

I found this interesting app on the BBC website. As our earth's population reaches another milestone, don't you ever wonder where you fit it? How many people came before you? How many people have been alive on earth from the beginning of time? (I'll leave any discussion of religion out of this. :) Which country is growing the fastest? Which country is shrinking in population? You can click here, type in your birthday and see where you fit into our world's population history. Very cool indeed. For even more info, visit the UN Population Fund's site - 7 billion and me.

But wait - It gets even better!

2011-10-25T08:37:00.000-07:00

So this is a continuation of my last post - sort of. I've come to find out that people hoop for lobsters off of the kayaks I mentioned below. Brilliant! Lobster season started earlier this month and a recreational license will set you back just $7. You have to go at night and being near a jetty or a protected cove helps. There's a cove off Catalina that's particularly good, though I admit I haven't been there ... yet. Bait the hoop net, throw it overboard, wait about half an hour and see what you catch. 20 feet of water should be deep enough to trap. Sounds like an adventure!

Kayak Love

2011-07-06T09:09:00.000-07:00

I'm doing it again. Fetishizing transportation. lol This time it's a kayak/sailboat hybrid. Now I'm not a fan of sea kayaking. I don't like feeling like a little twig, meandering on the vast ocean. Too slow, too vulnerable. This meaty beauty, however, is something to love. It's a kayak with 2 outriggers, a sail, and pedals (similar to a recumbent bike) to power the boat forward. No more paddling - WOW! (I realize I may be offending the purists among us and I'm okay with that - lol) It'll take about 5 hours to get to Catalina and I've just added that challenge to my bucket list. And since your hands are free, you can catch dinner on the ride over. Brilliant! You can learn more about these 1 or 2-person hybrids via Hobie Cat.

Here's an on-board view of this baby at sea.

No more blisters for the band?

2011-03-30T07:33:00.000-07:00

Italian product designer Max Battaglia has unveiled his Hyper Touch Guitar. It's a touch screen instrument with no strings. Via it's on-board interface, you can tweak the guitar's number of strings, tone, volume, etc.

I both wonder how it sounds and fear that in a couple generations, the acoustic stringed instrument will be relegated to the position of relic. I hope this isn't the case!!!!! You can read more about his designs at http://www.givingshape.it/

Welcome to your new leg workout

2011-03-21T08:39:00.000-07:00

Done in 60 seconds. :)

Man's answer to the push-up bra

2011-01-06T08:48:00.000-08:00

This makes me giggle with glee. Really.

I've occasionally wondered if a man ever feels cheated or wholly deceived when he unmasks a tit-set (yup - I said it - tit-set) from one of those Victoria Secret bras that promises a TWO cup-size increase. Bras, when fitted properly, can be miracle workers, magical anti-gravity machines, restoring youthful perkiness and hiding all sorts of nasty natural phenomenon that plague aging boobies. But men - listen up - Andrew Christian's come to your rescue!

The saying "Don't get mad - get even" comes into play with the designer's set of mens underwear that includes a soft, cushy cup in the shape of a penis. Y'all can now rock your own version of "I'm pretending to be more stereotypically sexually-appealing than my genes dictate." The brief's design even outlines a very prominent penis head. O....M....G!

Now, I confess - as I meander through this life, mostly in very polite society, the sight of such a bulge with a head clearly visible makes me question the bearer's common sense. The phrase "cover that sh*t UP" comes to mind. But candidly, if I've had a couple of drinks and find the bulge-owner attractive in other respects, I think I just might be intrigued and curious to learn more. lol

These magically-enhancing undies can be seen (and purchased) here at Andrew Christian's site.

I'd love to see just one set in person. Hell, I might even try 'em on.

It's ok to give a guy a break

2010-12-22T08:27:00.000-08:00

In January 1995, a research rocket was launched from Norway to study the aurora borealis. Boris Yeltsin was the Russian President and Russian officials, detecting the launch, mistakenly believed the incident signaled a US missile attack from a submarine. Yeltsin was brought the Russian nuclear-command suitcase and he was faced with the ungodly decision of launching a counter-attack against the United States. Long story short, he correctly decided the reports must be a mistake and life continued to along as usual. Thank you, Boris Yeltsin!

Very scary story, wonderful outcome. Again, thank you, Boris Yeltsin. Having said that, I've never seen this incident reported (on American television) without a wise-cracking addendum like "Phew - I'm glad he hadn't had his morning vodka yet" or "Thank god - it was early and he was sober."

I admit I have, at best, an 8th grader's understanding of 1990's Russian politics and I know Yeltsin was not a popular Russian president. But, I think it's frivolous and (I'm likely making up a word here - lol) unelegant to joke about something so serious. Actually, to joke about two things - a potential nuclear attack and a government official's drinking habits - in light of the gravity of the matter.

I don't really have more to add. It's just been on my mind recently - bothering me. You can read more about the incident here.

On a much, MUCH lighter note, Happy Holidays! :) lol

Wild Riversurfing

2010-12-02T18:05:00.000-08:00

This is the craziest river-surfing I've ever seen - in Switzerland no less!

If you lived here, you'd be home by now

2010-11-23T08:18:00.000-08:00

The perfect holiday gift for the office IT guy. Available at thinkgeek.com.

12 men, 12 nipples, 12 patterns

2010-11-03T07:35:00.000-07:00

Artists Fernanda Viégas and Martin Wattenberg create online visual representations of data. (Have I lost you yet? I promise that will be the driest sentence in this post :)

They've created very cool visual studies of erogenous zones, breast shapes, male nipple hair growth patterns (hence the title of this post) and body parts mentioned in songs, arranged by genre of music. After a visit to their site, I now know "the tush" is the most-mentioned body part in Hip-hop music. No surprise there really. :)

In any case, I can't really explain the site. I'm not doing it justice. The website is coolly interactive. There's nudity. It has a minimalist design. Go check it out. You will not be wanting that time back later. ;)

http://www.fleshmap.com

Ode to the Lixvibrator

2010-10-30T09:47:00.000-07:00

A vibrating tongue stud for the under-stimulated young bud.

In the mouths of an adventurous faction,
In the dreams of lonely men seeking action.

With a twirl and a lick,
he stood straight and proud quick,
introduced to exquisite quivering distraction.

The Lixvibrator - Vibrating tongue stud.
If you're really daring .... try the thrasher.

Speed Dating Your New Roommate

2010-08-09T21:01:00.000-07:00

A group in NYC has started having meet-ups for people seeking a roommate. If you have a spare room or you need to move, you're welcome at these organized events, usually held at friendly local bars. What a great way to avoid sloshing through online ads and fielding fruitless calls. While my roommate days thankfully are over, a similar groups in So Cal would be spectacular. Someone should start a local version asap. http://roommateswantednyc.com/

Brush the cow

2010-08-08T12:35:00.000-07:00

A corporate dairy company has installed giant brushes in 30,000 dairy farm barns across Sweden. It turns out that daily massages of milk-producing cows increase their milk yield significantly. Who wouldn't feel better after a good massage? More info here

Smell-a-vision dating site

2010-07-18T21:48:00.000-07:00

Match got ya down? Had no luck with Adultfriendfinder? If you haven't yet discovered the easy breeziness of dating an escort (poor dear!) then maybe you should check out http://www.scentoflove.com/ It's an online dating site where you matched to a mate by scent. Does it work? I have no idea but I suppose every little bit helps. :b God speed - lovelorn!

Jet-Powered School Bus

2010-07-08T23:10:00.000-07:00

This hot little number can reach speeds of 367 mph backed by a jet engine from a phantom fighter. 80-ft rear flames, 150 gallons fuel for a quarter-mile run - may the little ones never be late for class again. lol

The School Time Jet-Powered School Bus was created by Paul Stender.

So I'm standing on the beach

2010-06-14T22:57:00.000-07:00

So I'm standing on the beach, wondering about all that oil that's spilled into the gulf. Actually trying to figure out a way to visualize the amount of oil.

I wondered - if there was an equivalent amount of oil just on the surface of the ocean, what would it look like? So I set out trying to figure out the following: how big would an oil slick be if the same amount of oil was neatly, tightly organized into a 1 foot deep slick.

If I'm standing on the beach, and the oil is 1 foot deep, would there be oil as far as the eye could see? Would it be 5 times that? 100 times that? I had no idea but wanted to find out.

I played around with the idea here for anyone interested but essentially, the answer I came up with is a bit less than 5%. Essentially, if I was standing on a ridiculously straight beach and looked forward, out to sea, about 5% of what I saw out on the water would be a 1 ft deep oil slick.

Just another way to put it all into perspective. It's just horrible!

Have you had your fun today?

2010-05-19T08:46:00.000-07:00

Remember when we were in Africa?

2010-05-05T08:38:00.000-07:00

I caught a screening of the 2010 documentary "When You're Strange: A Film about the Doors." Narrated by Johnny Depp, it has loads of live footage: on-stage, back-stage, in the studio, interviews and day-in-the-life - very little of which I'd seen before. This is a kinder, gentler documentary - not overtly critical - definitely a fan movie though the narrative delves quite frankly into Jim's drug demons. It covers all the infamous controversial events in the bands' history. I highly recommend the movie for Doors' fans and aspiring rockers, as it chronicles the rise and fall - and the causes of the rise and fall - of the band. RIP Jim Morrison!

First date resumes

2010-04-04T14:30:00.000-07:00

Match.com is morphing into monster.com.

With the current unemployment rates, enterprising job-seekers are now using dating sites to mine for jobs - showing up to a first date with their resume in hand.

I was chatting with a friend recently about their online-dating experiences. Their profile described an affluent, well-educated executive in a technical industry and that was enough to catch the eye of a few job-seekers.

At the first (and only) meeting, their date demurely produced their resume and asked if there were any job openings at my friend's company. The scenario repeated itself two more times with other people.

So if you dip your toe in the realm of online-dating, be aware that this could happen.

Instant Snow

2010-04-04T14:12:00.000-07:00

Tired of the warm weather? Check out insta-snow. lol

Tilt Shift Online - Very Lovable :)

2010-01-10T15:00:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! So you've recovered from the holidays and finally downloaded your pix onto your HD. I've been playing with http://www.tiltshiftmaker.com/ and love it. Especially appealing to large-format junkies. Enjoy!

BEFORE

AFTER

My favorite goat

2009-12-19T12:13:00.000-08:00

This makes me smile. :)

Robert Raushenburg's Monogram completed 1959. Below is Scott Grieger's impersonation. hehe!

Happy Thanks!

2009-11-26T08:03:00.000-08:00

Thank you for your continued tenderness, affection, insight, generosity, trust and discretion. I've recently started referring to the experience as "Educating Paloma." lol You've taught me so much and I'm a better person because of it. Cheers!

Inspiration for the gym

2009-11-14T13:16:00.001-08:00

Here's a little video I ran across to inspire those of you that are trying to get back into shape. I think it's fantastic. :)

I can't say I'm too surprised

2009-10-21T21:21:00.000-07:00

but I do wonder about all that sex at sea .... and I love that some folks even describe the positions. lol Let's celebrate!

Ijustmadelove.com

RIP Hippie

2009-10-19T22:34:00.000-07:00

Matthew Shuter of Somerset, England has found an untapped niche. He bought a 1989 Daimler hearse and vinyl-wrapped it "to look something like the scenery from the Beatles' film Yellow Submarine." He figured, right about now, hippies would begin needing 'one final ride' and why not have them go out in a style to which they've become accustomed? You can read more here and visit his website here.

Come on - You know you want it

2009-09-20T10:18:00.001-07:00

Source

Grump

2009-09-15T08:43:00.000-07:00

My fav twitter citizen is 29 year old Justin who lives with his 73 year old father. Justin only tweets things his dad says and his dad is frank and dry. Better yet - Justin's just closed a book deal from his tweeting. He started tweeting Aug 3 2009. Wow - that's fast.

Here's a sampling.

"Your brother brought his baby over this morning. He told me it could stand. It couldn't stand for shit. Just sat there. Big let down."

"I just did an hour on the gym machine. I'm sweaty and I have to shit. Where's my fannypack, this workout is over."

Join Justin now at http://twitter.com/shitmydadsays

It's a man's game. Really.

2009-08-23T14:38:00.000-07:00

Once again, I find myself hesitating and yet ultimately capitulating to write about something that wouldn't be "polite dinner conversation." It's regarding drunk driving - sort of.

To varying degrees we each hate and fear drunk drivers. Given. But as a responsible pub proprietor, how do you educate a patron that maybe he's had too many cocktails to drive? You let them play while they pee. (I warned you!)

Bathrooms in several Frankfurt bars have been installed "pressure sensitive inlays set within urinals, enabling users to play while they pee." A screen comes on in front of the urinal with a driving game. To turn the car right, you pee right; to go left, you pee left. Did y'all get a poor score? Then you're probably too drunk to drive. Brilliant and disgusting at the same time. More info here

The Gift Economy

2009-07-22T22:21:00.000-07:00

After a stiff scotch on a rainy night in a remote cottage, it can be amusing to imagine "leaving it all behind" (and by "it all" I mean material possessions and money - certainly not family and friends :) and venturing off into the wilds of the countryside. Daniel Suelo did just that in 2000 and currently lives in a cave, completely outside of the economy. I'm intrigued. He's been blogging about his experiences here, with the help of free internet access at public libraries. That fact suggests he's not journeyed too far off the grid but his story inspires a sort of primal wanderlust in me I thought had vanished. You can read more about his remarkable story in Details.

Hampster's Revenge

2009-06-26T08:20:00.000-07:00

Play like a hampster in a giant ball on water. Beyond fun! Click here for more info.

2-second dresses

2009-05-05T08:27:00.000-07:00

Russian photgrapher Andrey Razumovsky has created stunning portraits of women in milk dresses. More here. His personal website is here.

3D Mobility

2009-04-21T08:11:00.000-07:00

With the upcoming release of the Star Trek movie, I've naturally been thinking about flying cars. YIPPEE! Ever since I saw a Harrier jet take off from a San Diego base, I've been lusting after the idea of VTOL - Vertical take off and landing, and there's car that can do just that. SKYCAR Cruise above the fray at 275 mph. Burn ethanol (or any number of other fuels) at up to 20 mpg. 750 mile range. Fly up to 36,000 feet. Need I say more?

World Taxi Meter

2009-04-09T18:18:00.000-07:00

A great website for determining cab fares in a smattering of major US and European cities and beyond. I hope the site keeps growing and adding more destinations. Love it. World Taxi Meter

Fear not - Furry Friend

2009-03-06T08:36:00.000-08:00

Every Friday night, dog lovers gather round the glow-box to see the newest episode of the "Dog Whisperer." And every Saturday morning, the household's Fido is shocked by the change in behavior of the pack leader (ie his owner), armed with a couple of new behavior modification ideas. Shorter leashes, controlled growls, less eye contact, foreign hand signals, a reprimand for something formerly OK. Thankfully, resolutions may be quickly forgotten and the weekend only lasts two days, so the furries can retreat back to their loud, hedonistic ways on Monday, as the pack leader heads out to earn more cash for kibble. So - how do the critters cope with this startling weekend chaos? Easy - they just "close their eyes and think of England." :b

Bugging me all week ....

2009-02-25T21:16:00.000-08:00

I may not be the brightest bulb in the chandelier but I just heard for the first time the phrase "Chindia" during a radio interview with a sociologist. The interviewee went on to explain "Chindia" as representing the emerging middle classes of India and China. (Thank god - he felt the need to explain it or I would've felt like a real dolt having to google it later.) So ummm I was ok with Bennifer and Brangelina because those phrases germinated from celeb mags and you gotta hook that audience with cute phrases - the literary equivalent of shiny, bright things. And - the phrases each only represented 2 people. But when clever people, referring to more that 1 billion people, start imitating the writing styles of gossip columnists - specifically the Indian economist, Jairam Ramesh (yes - I googled after all) who is credited with coining the phrase - I start to sweat ... and I'm actually more bothered by the fact that I don't know exactly why this upsets me so much. *sigh* I have no answer.

Early Speed Metal Fetish

2009-02-25T19:45:00.000-08:00

A 1937 Talbot-Lago T150 C SS Tear Drop Coupe. 1937! One of only 16 recently sold at auction for $3.52 million. Purrrrrrrrrrrr

It's raining in So Cal ....

2009-02-05T23:02:00.000-08:00

and oooooohhhhhh how I wish I could play on one of these. An all-terrain concept vehicle called the Hyanide - designed by Oliver Keller and Tillman Schlootz.

I, Too, Sing America

2009-01-20T11:00:00.000-08:00

I, Too, Sing America
by Langston Hughes

I, too, sing America.

I am the darker brother.
They send me to eat in the kitchen
When company comes,
But I laugh,
And eat well,
And grow strong.

Tomorrow,
I'll be at the table
When company comes.
Nobody'll dare
Say to me,
"Eat in the kitchen,"
Then.

Besides,
They'll see how beautiful I am
And be ashamed--

I, too, am America.

When polite becomes scary

2009-01-02T08:51:00.000-08:00

It was a clash of cultures when I noticed an incredibly beautiful young Japanese woman wearing a surgical face mask, strolling down PCH. In Japan, it's common to wear a face mask when one has a cold, in theory to protect others from your germs. In SoCal? Ummm, errrrr .... not so much. I almost, ALMOST pulled over to tell her this but then my light turned green and I had to get going. Oh well. Happy New Year!

Crush Pad - I can't stop loving you

2008-12-19T08:50:00.000-08:00

I've stumbled upon one of the most accommodating wineries I've ever heard of, planted right in the heart of Portrero Hill in San Francisco. Crush Pad Wine is a do-it-yourself winery where you can learn to make wine. They have all the equipment and will help the wine-making newbie through the entire process - all the way down to designing the label for your bottle. 50 vineyards, 14 varietals, 25 cases of your own wine. 'Scuse me while I kiss the sky. Crush Pad Wine

Drinking Up Vagueness

2008-12-03T20:22:00.000-08:00

A Singapore company, called Out of the Box, produces a line of beverages called "Anything" and "Whatever." It seems the drinks' developer started noticing repeated mild recklessness in his friends and colleagues when he would offer them a drink. They'd respond with "Whatever" or "Anything." (Some folks may call that being an accommodating guest but let's pretend otherwise :) Well, that enterprising host decided to capitalize on people's exact words - kinda like that old Brady Bunch episode - "Now Marcia - Were those your EXACT words?" So he started a beverage line and packages all the different drinks into generic cans - so you don't know what you're drinking 'til it hits your tongue. Your only choice is bubbly (Anything) or flat (Whatever). They're all non-alcoholic but things could get more interesting with a third beverage line named "I need a stiff one." Their website is here. Bottoms up!

Body Moving, Body Grooving - Long

2008-10-25T00:09:00.000-07:00

I saw a "60 Minutes" story about the particle accelerator in Europe, and noticed the wide-eyed, twitchy excitement of one of the project's scientists - when he was asked if he thought the project's research could possibly lead to the development of teleporting technology. Since then, I've been thinking about human transportation ALOT as in "Beam me up, Scotty" and, for better or worse, I've really only come up with questions. *sigh*

Where would the first teleport stages be installed? In hospitals? For emergency service professionals to get to accident sites? In the seats of national governments for heads of state? At the UN?

And what about country boundaries anyway? Would you still have to go through immigration first if you're porting to another country? Would we even need country boundaries if teleporting becomes freely available? I don't recall countries in Star Trek - in the teeny bit of Star Trek episodes I've watched - they were interested in entire planets. (I'm not even gonna touch inter-planetary porting ....)

And would teleporting become the new "space-shuttle ride" - only for the super rich adventurer? And as it becomes slightly more common, will an anxious stud take his date teleporting to impress her?

And what if repeated teleporting over time is bad for you - like too much sun? Will one day snooty babes whisper behind each others' backs - saying "Oooo - I think she's TP'd too much - it's starting to show" - like too much plastic surgery or drug use? Will there be permanent irreversible damage to the body from teleporting - something like - oh I don't know - subtle decay each time you do it? Ick.

And what about the possibility of instantaneous teleporting? What about being able to just push a button to get somewhere else?

What does this mean for thrill-seekers or fans of the game "chicken"? Someone could jump off a building or out of a plane sans-parachute and then teleport just before they crash. I suppose that would be another form of natural selection. Quick reflexes = ability to get out of bad situations FAST. And certainly, one could say that even having the thought to play "chicken" could be a natural selection factor. ;-)

And when it's still a fairly new technology, would there be TP amusement park rides that promise to both scare-the-crap-out-of-you but ultimately save you as the rider? You could be teleported to safety right before the point of impact? Think a moment about the guy who's job it is to hit the "transport riders now" button. I hope he's always happy and benevolent.

And what about being able to teleport based upon where another person is? What if you could say - "I want to teleport to where my friend Joe, the plumber is?" (couldn't resist - hehe) And what if your friend Joe doesn't want you to find him or have you near him at that moment? What if a person doesn't want to be found or caught in a compromising position? Are there going to be restraining orders or privacy laws in the future saying you can't teleport within 500 feet of another person if they don't want you to?

And what if people are, in the future, routinely GPS/micro-chipped and you can't find you child? Could you say "I want to teleport to my child - chip number 123456-69696?"

And I suppose we'd all get better at latitude and longitude if you have to punch in exactly where you want to go. Just saying "Send me to Paris" might not cut it. I mean Paris is a big, beautiful city but I'm sure there are parts I wouldn't want to go to.

And what about being able to instantaneously flee the scene of a crime? That could be social chaos.

And what if you could say "I want to be transported to the single place on earth that looks most like the landscape that I'm visualizing in my mind at this moment." Then you could see a picture and teleport right to that location. Cool.

And what if you saw a picture of a living person you've never met before, but you wanted to meet them - so you said "Teleport me to where that person is right now." Big problems for anyone that has groupies or a stalker.

And when you do teleport - do your clothes and personal items teleport with you or conversely, do you end up naked in a foreign country with no ID? Ouch.

And I suppose a new industry of impenetrable materials would develop. At least some buildings would need to be built of materials that you can't teleport through.

And how does the possibility of virtual reality affect the necessity for human teleporting anyway? Maybe it's more important to think about resource teleporting instead of people-porting?

Damn - I sound like Andy Rooney. I'm going to bed.

Women in Film

2008-10-17T08:45:00.000-07:00

Kudos goes to the person who can watch this vid without once hitting the pause button. Enjoy!

When a coma doubles your troubles

2008-10-05T08:01:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm not so inclined to yammer on this morning about something as frivolous and trite as crisp white linen or a breezy ocean boat ride. Don't get me wrong. My week's been exceptional and I feel as vivacious as ever, but something dark has piqued my interest. It's an online offering blending technology and man's ego - as it crashes into his postponed declarations, fears, and regrets.

Dead man's switch is a free service that stores encrypted email messages to be sent after your final demise. Basically, you pen your final thoughts in emails and submit them for encryption and online storage. Then, you're expected to check in with the DMS service online, at pre-determined intervals, to confirm that you are, in fact, still alive. If, after a few reminder emails, you remain unresponsive - your emails get sent. WHOA. Beautifully poignant if you're part of the "I-both-live-and-love-via-email" tribe or just downright dangerous, if you choose to throw daggers from your grave. What's that old joke? "Don't carry grudges. They're heavy and don't have handles." Dead Man's Switch.

Am I registered to vote?

2008-09-22T08:20:00.000-07:00

Am I registered to vote? You bet your sweet-candy liberty I am! But just to be doubly sure, you can surf over to voteforchange.com to verify your voter registration. At the site, you can register to vote, determine if you're already registered to vote, request an absentee ballot, and, as the election draws closer, find your polling place. You'll be asked for your first and last name, your email address and then "Are you registered to vote?" The options given are yes, no or not sure. If you chose "not sure," you'll be asked for your address. A click or two later, you know if you're registered. FANTASTIC!

Oh Sealand, I barely know thee

2008-09-16T12:27:00.000-07:00

There's a tiny principality off the south eastern coast of England called Sealand and it's offering titles for sale ....... titles as in nobility ...... as in "Lord" or "Baroness." It turns out that Sealand, established in 1967, covers about an acre in area and claims dominion over a floating pontoon base, which is the entirety of this micronation. It has a prime minister, a flag, a national anthem, currency, issues stamps and passports (over 150,000 passports to date - WOW!), and has suffered from treasonous citizens and forcible takeovers. (*sigh* - Isn't that the way of the world?) It's legal status isn't generally internationally-recognized but don't let that stop you from gaining a title there. They're selling them on the net and you can snap one up for less than $36. You can buy a title here and read more about Sealand here and at their official website here.

Google releases new browser

2008-09-05T15:45:00.000-07:00

This week, Google released it's open source browser in beta named Chrome. I haven't had a chance to check it out but here's a brief walk-through of it's features and a tip or two about installing it.

Cool goodies include malware alerts and incognito browsing - which, when activated, does not save your browsing history in the "sites visited" list. Chrome can be downloaded here. Enjoy!

Best Bouncers in the World

2008-08-20T08:46:00.000-07:00

In 1999, the trampoline was added to the gymnastics competition in the Olympic games. I can't say that I've been following the Beijing Olympics closely or that I even turn my TV on very often, but I'm definitely enamoured with trampolines. :)

Here's a slo-mo video of the men's competition. (I couldn't find any footage of the 2008 Beijing women's competition - *sigh*)

And a compilation of various trampoline competitions. (Warning - this video has music.)

I know fun when I see it and this frankly ROCKS! Weeeeeeeeeee! :)

The dog-cloning dominatrix?

2008-08-10T10:54:00.000-07:00

My first advert on the net was a breezy, whimsical story about cloning my dog. It received mostly positive interest with just 2 emails saying "I think dog-cloning is outrageous. You should be ashamed of yourself!" giggle (You can read the original story here.)

This week, another dog-cloner was ID'ed as possibly being the former captor to an imprisoned Mormon missionary she held for her dominatrix-esque desires. Her pix with her 5 cloned pit bull puppies drew the attention of the Utah filmmaker who had made a documentary about the 1970's case that has remained unsolved - perhaps until now. In reference to the suspected kidnapper's feelings for her sex slave she said: "I loved him so much," she told a judge, "that I would ski naked down Mount Everest in the nude with a carnation up my nose if he asked me to." You can read the entire article here.

A Peek Inside: Roleplay (long)

2008-08-04T08:24:00.000-07:00

Role-playing is pretty much a guaranteed good time. Scenarios run from the simple to the whimsically elaborate.

Simple would be: You're Wonder Woman. I'm Superman. GO!

Below is a much more elaborate seed for a role-play. The author - an accomplished, creative gentleman I admire immensely - has enthusiastically agreed to allow me to post this. I think it's star-ship fantastic - perhaps even more so because I know the author and am familiar with his sense of humor and sensibilities. It does nicely illustrate that, in these matters, one is really only limited by the scope of the imagination. (Some fantasy details have been tweaked to protect the innocent. :-)

The text of his letter to me follows below.
-------------------
You, Pricilla Goldbergerstein, a vivacious blond known to your many friends and fans as "Prissy", are a judge on the hit TV reality show "America's Got Talent." I'm a contestant. After making it through the first elimination round and being in the running for the finals to be held in Vegas, we happen to run into each other at City Hall, an upscale steakhouse in Phoenix. You live in Los Angeles and are in Phoenix for a celebrity appearance. I live in Phoenix. You're planning on having dinner. I'm dining on the the little wieners in sweet sauce.

My act in the "America's Got Talent" competition is that of an exotic male dancer (a la Chippendale's), an unusual act for the show, since most contestants are singers, dancers, jugglers, ventriloquists, munchausened miscreant knife throwers, dog handlers or tuba-playing transgendered teenagers. But of course, I don't take all my clothes off in the competition the way I do when I work the weekends at the Olympic Gardens strip club in Vegas. Yes, I have a big one, hence my stage name, "Mucho Gigante Geoffrey", or "MGG Money" to my friends.

Although the audience loved me in the early rounds, I'm a long shot to get to the finals in Vegas and I know it. I really need to get there because I desperately need the career boost and the money, and I'm horribly deficient in self-esteem, and I may lose custody of my kids in my divorce if I don't soon go mainstream with my dancing. (I also salsa dance but no one cares to see that *wink*.....even if I'm doing some Shakira and "her hips don't lie as she's startin' to feel me babe.")

So I just need to get to the finals.....I don't need to win. And of course, as a male dancer, I'm not real popular with the two male judges, so I need your vote.

Anyway, you're a former "Mouseketeer" and soap star who is one of "America's Sweethearts" and you have a squeaky-clean G-rated celebrity image (not to be confused with the Spot, a place as yet undiscovered in your body.) You're very attracted to me and, as I am attempting to seduce you, you realize the power you have to make me please you in any way you demand. Power corrupts and power corrupts Prissy absolutely.

I'm quite experienced in sensing what women want. I know you're complicated and have celebrity-induced insecurities and that you need to feel and act dominant, but in some respects, you also need to be subservient.....perhaps treated a little roughly and talked to with (just a little) dirty talk.

So you agree to dine with me and I come on to you, offering a private dance performance and more. But you think of Paula Abdul with that young male contestant on "Idol" and you start to pull back. You think of your marriage to your high school sweetheart, your two teenage daughters and what it would do to them, as well as your image, if we are discovered.

But then you realize you can have any fantasy you want fulfilled by me and it's brand new and so overwhelming. You sense I know how to please a woman and you become quite vocal on what you would want because Prissy is NOT taking this kind of risk for a MEDIOCRE erotic experience.

(Secretly, and unknown to me, you have a kinky side. For instance, you often masturbate in the guest bathroom of your own house during your many dinner parties and then (in your afterglow) you flirt unmercifully with both your male and female dinner guests.....even to the point of touching them casually with the same un-washed hand that was just in your most private parts.)

We continue to dine and talk and you are so turned on but desperately trying to remain in control. You are just full of the notion that for once, Prissy will be the one to tell a guy exactly what she needs and to demand total subservience from him. For maybe the last time in your life, you have an opportunity to explore your sexual self. And you deserve it. You've repressed your desire for men like me, as well as for the many hot women that have come onto you because you are Prissy. You want to taste the men, you want to taste the women, you want to dominate and be dominated.....you want to be entirely Prissy!

I continue to tell you that all you need is the courage to ask....I will do anything, do everything, talk to you the way you need, degrade myself, whatever, to get to the Vegas finals. I will go so far as to present MGG$ to you in your hotel room like a piece of meat to be examined, if necessary.

And you continue to test the waters, telling me exactly how it would go if we were together, what you want, step-by-step from the beginning to the end, telling me what I would need to do, if given this opportunity.

You are only in Phoenix for one night and you must now decide whether to take MGG$ back to the Phoenician, or spend another night masturbating and wondering if your husband, Rex, is really who you think he is. Hoping in some ways that he is not, and being mindful that there have been some odd occurrences over the years. Like the Playgirl magazine you found, his insistence on male masseuses when the two of you visit resort spas, his hints that a strap-on might be fun for the two of you, and the way spittle forms on his lips when he watches the male Olympic diving competition.

Dinner is over. It's showtime now, girl. Is Prissy a player or just an observer?

Sell that ring to heal thy heart

2008-07-27T09:31:00.000-07:00

You're young and in love and frolicking like wombats around the vernal equinox and then, suddenly, it just all falls ugly. You and your SO have just arrived at Splitsville and this time, you know it's for real. Now, you've got a pocketful of jewelry, salted with your tears, that you can't bare to wear and they refuse to reclaim it. GULP. Take a week to cry, rant, throw stuff, (but definately not email them) and then sell that metal online, if it'll help you, Phoenix rising. Exboyfriendjewelry.com makes that pain just a teensy bit more tolerable for both boys and girls, wronged in the sport of love.

Stiffen up with Watermelon

2008-07-20T16:58:00.000-07:00

I know, I know. The results of one scientific study don't make it fact, but this little gem is just too juicy to ignore. Researchers at Texas A&M University have discovered nutrients in watermelon that have some of the same effects as Viagra. How much watermelon do you have to consume to be a new local legend? That remains unclear but I'd guess switching to watermelon-tini's will make you lose Romeo-points, not gain them, at the bar. Vodka-spiked watermelon slices may be the more manly option. *wink* You can read more about the study here.

Eating to reveal her beauty

2008-07-13T15:51:00.000-07:00

It's baaaack! Eating sushi off of a beautiful body. It was a brief dining phenomenon in trend-hungry circles in the states a few years back and then it just as quickly faded from the common consciousness. Well, it's back in West Hollywood, CA and fun for both girls and boys. Hadaka Sushi offers nyotamouri (body sushi) either at their restaurant or in the privacy of your own home. Expensive - yes. Prices start just above $1000 and quickly blossom when drinks, desserts and appetizers are added. Brilliant idea though and I'm glad it's resurfaced. You come for the sushi and keep eating for the view. Sexy and delicious. Douzo meshiagare!

Let's test the mattress!

2008-07-05T09:14:00.000-07:00

Most hotel guests get a better night's sleep if they don't start wondering about the people that have stayed in the room before them. Other visitors shamelessly post evidence of their hotel room antics on the net. Nope, it's not what you think. It's bed-jumping! Click here for pics.

Is that Oscar I smell?

2008-06-27T08:56:00.000-07:00

Film industry trendsetters - take note. I know that adolescent hi-jinks are guaranteed a chuckle from some members of the movie-going audience. I'm thinking specifically of the apparently obligatory "jewel crush" scene, paraded once (if not more) through almost every adolescent-centric comedy. A man brought to his knees from a swift slam to the family jewels. A fall on a fence post, a punch from a toddler, a slide down a banister - pick your poison. It's a quickly-forgotten snicker. A cheap, uncomfortable laugh. The scenes are virtually ubiquitous in some film comedies and I understand that.

But what I propose is the following.

Why don't you, titans of the film industry, work together to make another type of scene just as ubiquitous and obligatory in future films, for those among us who don't giggle at crotch-crushing? Something a little racier, a little sexier, a bit dangerous, pulse-quickening and, quite frankly, one of my secret fetishes! I'm speaking of ......... women in fountains. YAY! Now, I'm not referring to the G-rated jig as seen in the opening credits of the 90's TV sit-com "Friends." I'm more interested in slow-motion, screaming-sex exhibitionism, best exemplified by Sherilyn Fenn in her party seduction scene from the 1993 dark obsession film "Boxing Helena."

Original Fountain Song (Boxing Helena)
Uploaded by Meowbay

What a saucy temptress. Mmmmrroooooooowwwwwww!

So I'm publicly appealing to the Hollywood, Bollywood, and Any-other-wood elite to please bombard the movie-eating public with more scenes of women in fountains. I promise you - we can handle it or, gosh darn, we'll do our best trying! We're up for THAT struggle! So, please overwhelm us ........ so much so, that one day in the future, we just might lament to our friends, "Yup, there's yet another sultry, must-see film with the obligatory woman-in-a-fountain scene. Sigh - I miss the simple j-crush......."

Earth's Largest Instrument

2008-06-21T08:46:00.000-07:00

David Byrne, ex-frontman of the Talking Heads, has rigged up the landmark Battery Maritime building in NYC and transformed it into the world's largest instrument, played with a keyboard. Fantastic! Among other things, wires and pipes run from the back of the keyboard to different parts of the building, causing parts of the infrastructure to creak, moan, rumble, howl and more. I've heard a bit of the results and I'd liken it to the spooky sounds of monsters in a basement dungeon. Not for everyone of course, but Byrne obviously continues to produce innovative sound projects. Best of all, you can play the keyboard and participate in this noisy adventure yourself! Closes Aug 10, 2008. You can read more here.

Simmons on Girls for Hire

2008-06-14T09:23:00.000-07:00

Gene Simmons, of KISS fame, has an upcoming book entitled "Ladies of the Night: A Historical and Personal Perspective on the Oldest Profession in the World." Co-written with Julie McCarron, the book begins "back in the day" with cave culture (Babe, why don't you hunt for that wooly mammoth this morning and I will ROCK your world tonight) and progresses all the way to where we find ourselves today. I just might pick up a copy, if only to better understand how the public's perception of the dance has changed over the millenia. Credit goes to Simmons for approaching the topic as a matter of self-empowerment for women. You can read an interview with Gene about the book here and pre-order the book via Amazon. Release date: July 7, 2008.

Doll parts

2008-05-31T09:32:00.000-07:00

Plastic baby doll centipedes. Down right spooky! This toddlerpede comes from the deliciously deviant mind of artist Jon Beinart. You can read more about the artist here. I especially like the worn-out, greying head. Frankly, I'd look a bit angry too if I had 34 arms.

Dinner on a Crane

2008-05-24T08:33:00.000-07:00

While some are feeding at the newest have-to-be-seen-there supper club, others are choosing to dine while dangling from a crane, and paying quite a high pence for the experience. It brings new weight to the phrase "Oooopps, I dropped my fork" and the all-too-common "I need to use the little girls' room" because that entire table is heading back down to earth, if you can't hold it any longer. http://www.dinnerinthesky.com/

A Billboard for the Panty Peekers

2008-05-17T08:50:00.000-07:00

If you love to see something you probably shouldn't, especially when it involves a woman's silky lingerie, then this billboard is for you! With a particularly strong gust, her skirt flies up and you can sneak a peek. Rapturous joy - panty lover! :)

Surfing in the City

2008-05-10T08:53:00.000-07:00

There's a surf spot in Munich. Who knew? It's a particular point in a man-made wash where the water flows up to create surfable waves. It's similar to those small current pools people swim in or a wave pool, except it happens naturally. One surfer at a time and I bet that water's FREEZING! You can read more about it here.

Silent Disco

2008-04-26T09:17:00.000-07:00

A roomful of writhing, beautiful people and you can still whisper sweet nothings into your night's latest hottie. I LOVE IT! Silent Disco is a club concept where every dancer wears wireless headphones to hear music. Take the headphones off and you see a roomful of people wiggling, breathing hard and not caring about how they look. Wow!